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If you've ever suffered through a long-distance relationship, you're familiar with the painful mix of love, longing, and resentment.

But technology was supposed to make it so much easier. Let me just say this: I didn't see the iceberg coming.

Sometimes my dude and I would get so frustrated with buffering video that we'd talk on our more reliable cell phones instead while staring at pilated images of each other on our laptops. ) It's like an episode of Maybe the Internet gods were trying to warn us.

Because what this technology really offers is faux intimacy: It's the perception of intimacy with the added hangover that comes with waking up in a queen-size bed next to nothing but your laptop. So I fashioned a plan that kept my boyfriend and me connected but wasn't so all-consuming that it killed our respective lives.

It would also provide some awesome white calendar space to get my own shit done. We were suddenly thousands of frequent-flier miles apart, shuttling back and forth for birthdays and conjugal visits but mostly just communicating digitally.

I tried to have a good attitude about the whole thing—at first. It helps that texting is free, too, thanks to Whats App, which works anywhere you have a Wi-Fi connection, even internationally.

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